Canadian researchers claim dodgeball is oppressive
So, I’m a little bit late to the party on this one, but it’s mostly because when I first saw this story on the National Post of researchers begging schools to ban dodgeball for being oppressive, I thought it was just really, really good satire. Unfortunately, I was mistaken.
According to “researchers,” a term which has decreased in value faster than late 2000’s Blackberry Stock, dodgeball isn’t just some harmless game apart of a meaningless easy-A highschool class. No, what dodgeball actually is, is yet another tool of oppression, meant to dominate the weak!
According to UBC professor Joy Butler, dodgeball’s seemingly harmless ways, actually contain a “hidden curriculum” which is antithetical to the empowerment of students!
David Burns, professor of educational studies at Kwantlen Polytechnic University, claims there is a core issue within dodgeball that makes it a particularly nasty sport. The moral problem with dodgeball, he says, is that it encourages students to aggressively single out others for dominance. That dodgeball, as a sport, encourages brash displays of power and ability, by whipping a ball at a helpless victim.
In the 2004 comedy Dodgeball, Patches O’Houlihan claims the five D’s of dodgeball are “dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge.” The real five D’s are “demoralizing, dehumanizing, destructive, disheartening, and dread.”
To subject our weakest members of society who surely thrive in no other areas in life must come to an end, no matter what! As we all know, every single thing that exists can be broken down to one question, “who has the power?” So what are the steps that need to be taken to ensure that dodgeball becomes a fair, balanced, and un-oppressive game?
Perhaps dodgeball is too entrenched in its oppressive ways to change. So, let’s just make a new game altogether to replace dodgeball! Luckily for you, dear oppressed reader, we have gone through the trouble of concocting a new game, specifically designed to even the playing field. We’ve named it “Fair dodgeball,” and it’s destined to be a much fairer game than the old oppressive dodgeball. The rules will go as followed:
RULE 1: Larger, stronger, and faster players cannot touch a ball
As we all know, it’s generally those who are unfairly athletically gifted who succeed most in dodgeball, and thus, are the perpetrators of the most oppressive actions. To ensure that overly-abled bodied participants don’t have a fair advantage, we will remove one of their chief tools of oppression… The dodgeball. This will ensure that any weaker, slower, or agility-challenged players have a better chance of succeeding.
RULE 2: Weaker players cannot be eliminated (by violence)
To ensure that the power imbalance is minimized, we need to ensure that players prone to elimination have a safety net. To ensure that their participation is not undervalued, we will ensure that oppressed players cannot be eliminated from the game, all but guaranteeing that their presence on the team is appreciated. This also ensures that these players can only be eliminated by having someone on the opposing team catch a ball thrown by them.
RULE 3: The winning team is publicly shamed
As a final touch, we will make sure that the winners of fair dodgeball don’t feel good about their oppressing of weaker individuals. So, whenever a team wins in fair dodgeball, they will be pilloried, and have tomatoes thrown at them until they admit that their actions were oppressive and unnecessary. The losing team is then rewarded $5000 of taxpayer money.
No, it doesn’t matter that all you have to do to get an A in gym class is to arrive on time and give no more than 30% of an effort. Those who are oppressed go through enough in life, and a much fairer dodgeball is a necessity in today’s modern society.
It’s 2019. It’s about time we talk about dodgeball.
While our prime minister can survive a blackface scandal, the same can’t be said for these pumpkins.
Bed Bath & Beyond has removed all black Jack-o’-lanterns from their shelves after a News 12 uncovered complaints that a law firm’s display had generated outrage.
The niche jack-o-lanterns are incredible festive, adding a moderate touch of Gothic to the already dark holiday.
However, it’s 2019, and some colours must not be appropriated. Due to complaints from community members, the plastic pumpkins were removed from the Feerick, Nugent, MacCartney Law Offices in Nyack to take the pumpkins down less than 48 hours after setting them up.
“We understand that someone complained about them and so once we got word of that we immediately took them down,” says law firm partner Mary Marzolla.
“We represent people of all colors and faiths, and we would never do anything to exclude anyone from any community.”
The pumpkins had also been custom made, each being engraved with the name of a partner at the firm. Marzolla asserts the pumpkins were purely meant to be festive and not designed to offend anyone.
” It’s just nothing I take offense to personally, but since it did offend someone we took proactive steps to take it down,” says associate Alak Shah.
However, taking them down wasn’t enough.
Local NAACP Director Wilbur Aldridge said it shows an “extreme lack of sensitivity,” and now both attorneys have scolded Bed Bath & Beyond over their insensitivity and lack of foresight.
Bed Bath & Beyond, of course, bent the knee and capitulated, removing all of the pumpkins from sale.
On Monday, two children in Montreal were found killed by their father, who later committed suicide. The children, one girl and on boy, aged five and seven respectively, were found by their mother at 9 p.m. on Tuesday when she returned from work to her house on Curatteau St. at Pierre-De Coubertin Ave. in the Tétreaultville district, reports the Montreal Gazette. The father was found dead in the next room, and police ruled that it was a suicide.
Police report that neighbours had seen the father outside at roughly 3 p.m., only hours before the bodies were discovered.
“The father had his head down and didn’t say hello,” said another neighbour.
One woman, whose son was friends with one of the children, said the boy had come over to play just last Saturday, and that he will be missed by her son.
“They played in the basement for two hours,” said Mayela Sandoval. “They met this year and my son really liked him, they played together every day.”
Neighbour Manoj Chandarana told reporters that he saw four police cruisers and two ambulances hurrying to the scene and knew something was terribly wrong.
“There are suicides, we know that, but to take the lives of children is not acceptable,” he said. “Just think, if they were here today, they would be at school or daycare. Children look to their parents for protection.”
Police are still investigating the circumstances which led the 40-year-old man to commit such a terrible act.
On Wednesday, October 23, Essex Police discovered a transport truck containing the dead bodies of 39 people believed to be from Bulgaria. 38 have been identified as adults, while one was a teen. All 39 were pronounced dead on site.
According to police, one 25-year-old man from Northern Ireland, the driver of the vehicle, has been arrested and remains in custody on suspicion of murder.
“We believe the lorry is from Bulgaria and entered the country at Holyhead on Saturday 19 October and we are working closely with our partners to investigate,” says Deputy Chief Constable Pippa Mills in a press release.
“We have arrested the lorry driver in connection with the incident who remains in police custody as our enquiries continue. I appreciate this cordon is going to disrupt the activity of local businesses in the area and we will work to ensure that disruption is kept as short as possible. We are working with Thurrock Council to mitigate against any impact our investigation scene will have locally.”
Police say they were alerted to the existence of the truck shortly before 1.40 am Wednesday morning. They received reports that a number of people had been found inside a lorry’s container at the Waterglade Industrial Park on Eastern Avenue in Grays.
A full murder investigation into the tragedy and role the driver played is now underway. Police say that they have so far been unable to identify any of the victims and anticipate that it will be a lengthy process.
The circumstances surrounding the truck and the transport of so many people remain unknown to the public.
“This is a tragic incident where a large number of people have lost their lives. Our enquiries are ongoing to establish what has happened,” says Mills.
“We are in the process of identifying the victims, however, I anticipate that this could be a lengthy process.”
Today, the BC Human Rights Tribunal released their bombshell ruling in favour of all of the defendants Jessica “Jonathan” Yaniv had brought suits against for declining to provide services to her male genitals. In three of the cases, Yaniv was ordered to pay $2,000 in damages each to Sandeep Banipal, Marcia DaSilva, and Sukhdip Hehar for “improper conduct.”
The details of the ruling, released in a 60-page document, includes stunning detail of the Tribunal’s decision, with Yaniv being described as “engaging in extortionate behaviour,” and “being untruthful” with details, as well as “offering evidence calculated to mislead the Tribunal.”
Most shockingly, the Tribunal recognized the reality that the majority of defendants in the case were racialized women, and documented a condemnation of Yaniv as being on a mission to “punish” certain racial groups for not “assimilating into Canadian culture.” According to the ruling documents, Yaniv allegedly attempted to explain away the volume of suits against racialized women as an unavoidable consequence of “these are the only people” who provide these aesthetic services.
The Tribunal didn’t buy it.
Speaking with the Justice Centre for Constitutional Freedom’s Jay Cameron, one of the key lawyers who worked on behalf of the women pro bono, the excitement over the ruling rang through his voice.
“One of the clients I spoke with was crying. It was a very heavy weight off her shoulders—the stress, the loss of income. She was exceedingly relieved.”
Commending the Tribunal for their comprehensive ruling, Cameron discussed the details of the document released by the BCHRT.
“It became evident there was a [racial] pattern with the complaints once there was more information about them.” Cameron says, noting that the pattern wasn’t immediately clear due to the publication ban, which obscured the details from case to case. But once the individual respondents were named, all became clear. Cameron also stated that the comments made by Yaniv at the tribunal proceedings itself revealed a highly charged racial sentiment.
“Yaniv’s perception of why there was a refusal to provide a service—whether because of culture, religion, or failure to conform to Canadian social norms as Yaniv sees them.” Cameron says, “That became something obvious that we had to advance on behalf of the defendants—that there was an improper motivation for the complaints.”
The Tribunal ruling revealed that Yaniv had also used fake Facebook profiles and profile images to solicit services from the women in an attempt to present as either a biological female, or significantly more feminine and far along transition than Yaniv in fact was.
On this, Cameron says “Yaniv realized when using their ordinary physical presentation on Facebook, that the women were saying look, we don’t provide this service to men because we don’t service male genitalia,” continuing, “So to work around that, Yaniv thought to work around that I will present as something stereotypically female and then spring it on them later.”
Cameron adds that the Tribunal found it was improper and calculated to obtain sufficient evidence against a service provider to ground a human rights complaint.
While Cameron said he could not comment on whether or not he foresees Yaniv attempting to ground a complaint against him in the wake of his latest victory, he offered that the Justice Centre was a public constitutional firm that did pro bono work on public interest cases.
“The friction between self-identification and service providers, that’s of public interest. The theatrical aspects of some of the complainant’s behaviour, that’s of public interest. The Justice Centre exists by virtue of the fact that people make donations.”
While the Tribunal cases for the estheticians may have come to a close, Yaniv has already launched two additional suits… One in the BCHRT against anti-LGBT Christian activist Bill Whatcott for allegedly misgendering Yaniv, and one in the BC Civil Courts against a Vancouver-area physiotherapist after the table Yaniv had been lying on allegedly broke.
In both cases, Yaniv is seeking the maximum allowable claim of $35,000.